I had an interesting conversation today. A friend called up and we spoke for a long time. How is life, he asked. Couldn't be better, I said. Even if life, at the moment the question is being asked, makes one want to nestle in a cocoon never to come out if possible; I just say `Couldn't be better'. More than anything else, it cheers me up. It takes away the temporary insanity of impossible situations and look to a `niceness’ a few hours away.
After a while, my friend asked — Hey, what would you like to do before you die? Ahem! I did not think my general well-being lent any scope for such questions. I just had to know. Why, I asked. Oh, just like that, he said. I haven’t really chased that thought. Desires are there, of course. But a list? Never made one.
An opportunity was presenting itself. I could not let it pass. My friend said no time would be given for thought. “Just say it quick. Think I am the genie who is granting you the wishes. I will disappear any moment.” Sounded fun. I came up with my list. To work for a sensible boss. Aha.. temporary insanity of a ridiculous situation did come in the way of a wish. My friend laughed. Let’s start all over again, I said.
To write a book, travel more, live in Ooty in a house surrounded with trees and a river flowing by, to live in Kerala for a short time. I said all of this quickly and then realised more than anything else -- if I could read all the newspapers in the morning without the doorbell pealing with the milkman, laundry and all other important people demanding my attention, if I could take a bath without the phone ringing at least once, if I could find a rickshaw to get me to the station on time and if I could write the moment I log in, without having to think and think and then fetch a cup of coffee and still think! That would be a wonderful life.
All the other wishes could wait. Life is about the now, after all.
Friday, August 29, 2008
Sunday, August 3, 2008
A Ray Fan
I finally saw the Apu trilogy. I have to admit Ponnu was right. The films were worth their while.
The trilogy is about poverty. It is very sad. These were some of the comments I had heard about it from friends. Who wants to watch a film and cry and then go back to reality sad and unhappy, I thought. So I never saw the films. Ponnu was introduced to the films, when she joined the Film Society in her college. We went all over the city searching for the CDs. But none had it. So we went about putting requisition slips for them at video stores. It was a futile attempt. My friend in office, a Ray fan, said she had the CDs and was gracious to offer to copy them for Ponnu. My girl went large eyed and open mouthed when I gave her the CDs.
Ever since the CDs came home, I have had no peace. “Ma, please watch Pather Panchali.” I would nod and say, `Later’. But one late evening, I was pinned down and saw the film. It was sad but not bleak, I remarked. “You watch the other 2 CDs and you will not regret it,” said Ponnu. I nodded. After a long gap and much prodding from Ponnu, I saw the last two films in the trilogy last week. We saw Aparajito and I could not stop myself from crying over the mother-son relationship. Children grow up and other things in life become so important that they seem to be uncomfortable in their old environs. It is a reality, of course, but I still cried.
Ponnu wanted me to see Apur Sansar the moment Aparajito was over. It was quite late by then. But I agreed. The film started and a few minutes later, I dozed off. It was just a blink affair. But Ponnu caught me in the act. She was livid. “How can you sleep when you are watching a Ray film?” I said, “No, no. I did not. Just dozed off. But haven’t missed anything.” She switched off the video. I did not protest. I went off to sleep. Next evening, I asked her to show me the film. She was more than happy. I saw it and my heart ached -- for the loss of Apu’s wife, for the tragedy that never seems to leave Apu all his life and the loneliness of Apu. No, it is not a sad film. It is a film about an ordinary man’s life with no gilt edges. About what all of us aspire to in life and where our circumstances take us.
I am happy Ponnu is glad I watched the films. It is like the time she wanted me to read, `To Kill a Mockingbird’, and I resisted. I said, `Not now. Later’. After much nagging by Ponnu, I read it and fell in love with it. I read the book again twice! I will go back to watching the trilogy back-to-back once.
The trilogy is about poverty. It is very sad. These were some of the comments I had heard about it from friends. Who wants to watch a film and cry and then go back to reality sad and unhappy, I thought. So I never saw the films. Ponnu was introduced to the films, when she joined the Film Society in her college. We went all over the city searching for the CDs. But none had it. So we went about putting requisition slips for them at video stores. It was a futile attempt. My friend in office, a Ray fan, said she had the CDs and was gracious to offer to copy them for Ponnu. My girl went large eyed and open mouthed when I gave her the CDs.
Ever since the CDs came home, I have had no peace. “Ma, please watch Pather Panchali.” I would nod and say, `Later’. But one late evening, I was pinned down and saw the film. It was sad but not bleak, I remarked. “You watch the other 2 CDs and you will not regret it,” said Ponnu. I nodded. After a long gap and much prodding from Ponnu, I saw the last two films in the trilogy last week. We saw Aparajito and I could not stop myself from crying over the mother-son relationship. Children grow up and other things in life become so important that they seem to be uncomfortable in their old environs. It is a reality, of course, but I still cried.
Ponnu wanted me to see Apur Sansar the moment Aparajito was over. It was quite late by then. But I agreed. The film started and a few minutes later, I dozed off. It was just a blink affair. But Ponnu caught me in the act. She was livid. “How can you sleep when you are watching a Ray film?” I said, “No, no. I did not. Just dozed off. But haven’t missed anything.” She switched off the video. I did not protest. I went off to sleep. Next evening, I asked her to show me the film. She was more than happy. I saw it and my heart ached -- for the loss of Apu’s wife, for the tragedy that never seems to leave Apu all his life and the loneliness of Apu. No, it is not a sad film. It is a film about an ordinary man’s life with no gilt edges. About what all of us aspire to in life and where our circumstances take us.
I am happy Ponnu is glad I watched the films. It is like the time she wanted me to read, `To Kill a Mockingbird’, and I resisted. I said, `Not now. Later’. After much nagging by Ponnu, I read it and fell in love with it. I read the book again twice! I will go back to watching the trilogy back-to-back once.
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