A Single Child

When one has an only child, there are well meaning relatives and friends who tell you your decision to have a single child is not quite right. “Single children grow up to be selfish, they don’t share their belongings with anyone. They throw terrible temper tantrums,” is what they believe and say. None of this could be wrong. But it need not be true as well.

I don’t think this thought bothered me at all for a child picks up what she is taught by parents and elders or what she sees the family doing. This is my belief.

When Ponnu was in school, there were times she exhibited traces of jealousy when I showed a fondness for a neighbour’s kid or was carrying a child too long in my arms. But never did she ever ask why she was an only child. Even when Ponnu was well beyond her teens, I still heard this comment from relatives who rued our decision to have a single child.

One day I decided to know Ponnu’s thoughts on the matter. “Would you have preferred a brother or a sister?” She replied, “To have them treating my books badly?” I said they would not, considering she was their sister. “You know, a brother or a sister for company,” I said. Her answer as usual amused me. “Ma, I would have preferred an elder brother.” Well, well, well!

Now when my relatives still shake their heads to a `single child’, I smile widely.